Family Easter
This past year has been tough, am I right? This time last year, we were being told it would just be a sacrifice of two weeks to flatten the curve and we all jumped in – Governors all over the country shut down non-essential business (including mine), and we waited. We shuttered down to protect the vulnerable and to reduce the spread. Many were terrified, though at the time the cases in our county were somewhere around 12 new cases a day (not the thousands it was at its peak). Two weeks turned into four, then six – and we were the lucky ones.
I refused to allow fear to run my life, but I did become more cautious. We wore our masks, especially when we were around the vulnerable or those who were very cautious, and every time we were asked to. I believe firmly in the sovereignty of God, but also believe we are asked to be kind and to be cautious. We did end up with a thankfully mild case of the virus at the end of last year, but I’ve seen enough behind the chair to know that this virus is both very very real, and very very unpredictable. We should all be doing our part.
I think doing our part looks different for every family. With my husband and I both working in and about the public, we knew we were taking more risks than many. My mom and stepdad (my father lives out of state) chose a full lock down (including from family). They wiped groceries down and hosted 10 foot masked outdoor distanced ‘gatherings. No hugs, with lots of ‘huhs?” and ‘what did you says?’ behind masked grimaces. There were children that didn’t understand why they couldn’t hug their grandparents. It was heartbreaking. Not heartbreaking for my family to have made the choice they did, because we of course understood the caution, but heartbreaking to have had the family we are close to ripped away seemingly overnight. It seemed unnatural. It was unnatural.
Let’s talk about the beauty to be found in that mess. I’m the beauty girl, you know, so there is always beauty to be found. Beauty during COVID looked like renewed intentionality with our immediate family. We went on hikes, we had family Mario kart nights, and we cooked delicious food in the kitchen together. My mother hosted weekly (sometimes a few times a week) zoom meetings where she got to see the kids and played games every time with them like scavenger hunts. Nothing like making dinner and a streak running through the kitchen to be the first to find a spatula for the zoom scavenger hunts. My mom sent them small gifts in the mail and dropped things on the porch. My brother and sister-in-law hid eggs in our yard last year for an Easter surprise. The renewed intentionality did so much to help my kids feel connected. We were provided for and cared for like we had never seen by the Lord. There was a lot of pain, but also so much joy. At the same time, beauty looked like being ever so grateful for my in-laws and their side of the family, our connection with them and their choice not to distance from us – despite the risk.
My parents lock down became even more locked down this fall when we found out my stepfather had cancer which required him to undergo chemotherapy. Because of his condition, we became more and more cautious in an effort to protect him. We cut his long hair, and I knit him a hat with a ponytail for Christmas – that was a special, and hilarious sight.
Nothing replaces in-person, up-close gatherings. Thankfully, all the adults in my family were able to get fully vaccinated by Easter this year. We cancelled Easter last year with my family, we didn’t gather for Memorial Day, Labor Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, or Christmas. We had no get togethers. We tried zoom for some of those things, but it was just so different. Earlier this year, when I got my first COVID vaccine I called my sister and told her that I was one step closer to lasting immunity. Her response? ‘Renata, we can get together for Easter!’ and I cried. That’s how much I have missed my family. Nothing has ever come between me and my family, but this virus did. It’s divisive. Some don’t have the luxury of being able to completely shutter down. They don’t have jobs they can do from home, and they need to be able to make money to support themselves. Suddenly, it turned into the ultra-quarantined versus the not so quarantined and people became nothing more than potential virus carriers. Thankfully, my family is loving, and they are understanding, but perhaps beauty here might look like refusing that conclusion, choosing to treat people like people who are able to navigate risks for themselves given their specific situation and by all means are MUCH more than just a potential virus carrier.
Easter is such a special day for us anyway. We get to celebrate the Resurrection of our Savior, the most pivotal moment in history. What a joy – always! This year, though, was even more joy because it was also the day that I hugged my niece. I got to hug my mom. I got to hug my stepfather and my grandmother, and everyone else. The kids got to do an egg hunt and spent way too much time using belly bumpers on the trampoline and laughing hysterically. I got to see smiles and excitement. I have never been more thankful for a vaccine – not the vaccine, but rather the knowledge gifted to talented scientists who were willing to work hard to get families back together safely.
We met outside and did it safely, but we got actual time as a family – not behind a screen (though I am thankful for them too), not at a 10-foot distance, and without fear. For that, I am endlessly grateful.
